Persuasion and not commands is the more likely way to influence me (Article)

By Stanley Collymore

Please, I do seriously, with you candidly stating that you’ve taken a personal and romantic interest in me, have in turn to insist, on the firm basis of other things you’ve also said, that if you truthfully wish to have any kind of meaningful relationship with me that you first understand and then fully acknowledge, in the given circumstances that we now find ourselves in, that you must unambiguously and likewise straightforwardly try your hardest, as a subsequent part of this, to openly recognize and willing accept me for the man that I evidently am, and not essay in any calculating way to either arbitrarily or unilaterally, for that matter, endeavour to change me into someone, and for me an unrecognizable person, who you would much prefer that I eventually or more acceptably immediately become.

Sorry then to disappoint you! For let me make it unequivocally clear and as best that I can for you to comprehend. Such a distinctly one-sided and furthermore a patronizingly authoritarian plan only represents for me a misguided scenario on your part that not now or at any time in the foreseeable future is ever likely, by me, to be allowed to happen. And for the absolute and very obvious reason, when everything is said and done, that I specifically and moreover, rather like me for who and what I am!

We all of us either already, or will certainly do so in the future, have persons of one sort or another invitingly from us or unilaterally by them enter our individual lives in a manner that we’re absolutely delighted with or alternatively in some circumstances we distinctly on our part regard as a diabolical liberty unwarrantedly inflicted on us by them; while on theirs, and again from our own perspective, consider their unilateral and inconsiderate actions as the summation of what the worst case hellish scenario in any such attempt at a relationship actually represents.

And while there are those who will unfortunately be influenced by fear, the real or imagined incidence of retaliation prompted by rejection of any of these persons, cowardice, a marked reluctance not to deliberately cause offence or even the stigma of personal loneliness into not doing anything to remedy this intolerable situation that you happen to be in, it literally makes no sense to carry on in this unwarrantable way indefinitely. Since the only person who winds up feeling totally uncomfortable, being utterly miserable and hating yourself for what you’re implicitly allowing to happen to you is yourself.

So why not if you’re likely to be or even inadvertently find yourself in such untenable and perplexing circumstances do what the clear-sighted and no-nonsense among those of us do and decide for yourself independently who and what you convincingly and truthfully want to be? It won’t do you any harm and conversely might end up doing you a whole lot of good!